how to stop someone from telling your secret

Or, maybe they mislead someone in order to achieve an end goal. Cultivating the willpower to remain quiet will ensure that the secret is kept and will maintain your reputation as a trustworthy person. You may want to warn them about this before they tell you the secret. "Guess what, my little brother is dating a girl, and arrghh, how I hate that … This … People lie all the time in small ways, but telling a lie to protect someone else’s information can be uncomfortable: We feel we’re being willfully dishonest–which, technically, we are. Tap the People icon at the … Oops, I Know that already. Admit that you were wrong to tell the secret. Choose someone who can keep secrets and who will support you in your desire to be more conscious of what you say. Normally, your Facebook friends can see everything you post on your timeline. Try to change the subject casually so that the person does not notice that you are avoiding telling her something. Explain how surprises should be fun and everyone should know about the surprise soon—unlike a secret which may be “forever.”. They won't share your secret. Know that telling anyone opens up the possibility that the secret will get out. Be sure you are truly in an anonymous environment. How do I stop telling someone my secrets? "If you love someone, sacrifice the truth in these situations. Gather your evidence if you decide you need to confront the secret-keeper. If the secret in question could have legal consequences if you reveal it, you'll need to be even more careful to. This article explains how to prevent Facebook users from chatting with you, seeing most of your activity, or interacting with you on Facebook accessed through a web browser. Step 2 Admit that you were wrong to tell the secret. How do I keep my one night stand a secret from my husband? Asking if it is okay to tell can help you avoid an uncomfortable situation in which the person is upset with you. Use the word “surprise” instead of “secret.”. Keep reading to learn how writing down the secret can help you avoid confessing it! ... You are asking someone to change their behavior for you. If you put it in a trash can, tear it into pieces and bury it underneath the trash. "It's much kinder to harbor little white lies having to do with your partner's haircut, hair color, meatloaf recipe, and dance moves," says April Masini, a relationship and etiquette expert. Please help us continue to provide you with our trusted how-to guides and videos for free by whitelisting wikiHow on your ad blocker. How do I keep a secret from my friend who knows I have a secret and won't stop nagging me about it? What can I do? "Don't keep your debt a secret," advises April Masini, a relationship and etiquette expert and author. So it’s a good idea to keep your AppleID a closely guarded secret. It helps if you are forgetful. Eliza Martinez has written for print and online publications. You may regret telling someone immediately, and giving yourself a few days to calm down may help you make more rational decisions about when to tell people and who to tell. Depending on the secret, you may not want to tell other people that you knew before they did. 2. Monica Torres. Have they been trustworthy and discreet in the past? Traditional cultures teach that calling something by its real name is the only way to gain power over it. Never tell them to others and certainly never turn a secret into gossip. If you’ve been asked to keep a secret, avoid talking about the topic of the secret with anyone else. Also distract yourself from the secret. Express remorse. Or maybe you heard about it via social media. It’s pretty sad when we must resort to research in determining whether or not a person can keep a secret. Martinez holds a master's degree in psychology. If you know you will tell someone, like a spouse, be up front with that information and warn the person that you are going to tell someone else. If you want advice on some matters, maybe you should look for somebody else, such a comprehensive teacher or if your school has one, a psychologist. Try to change the subject casually so that the person does not notice that you are avoiding telling her something. Consider burning it (safely) or shredding it in a paper shredder. Someone who jumps on your computer won’t see where you’ve been. It will also tell you if you need to give the person your undivided attention while they disclose their secret (looking at your phone while having a serious talk is poor etiquette). Admitting to a mistake and apologizing is very difficult for some people. Word travels fast. The person will appreciate your honesty and still has the option of telling you, knowing that you may tell someone else. Be patient and try not to take it personally. Respect what you … "Disclose it early in a relationship and don't make excuses. Prepare yourself for a conversation that will likely be uncomfortable, as the person you are confronting has likely been under a great deal of stress in keeping this secret, according to author and life coach Martha Beck. It also tells your friend or family member that you understand that you've hurt her by your actions. Again, be sure that there is no one nearby to overhear what you are saying. Talk to her about the seriousness of cheating and try and get her to break one of the relationships off. What can I do? Talk about healthy surprises, such as a surprise trip to the beach or a surprise present. If she does continue to talk about it, tell her, softly, that you don't want to tell her. Tell the person you hurt that you were wrong and that you know broke his trust and hurt his feelings by not respecting his request to keep the information to yourself. Try waiting a few days if you feel very emotional about the secret. If it is not on your mind as often it is less likely that you will tell someone by mistake. Researchers Reveal 5 Ways to Tell If Someone Can Keep A Secret. If you offer it as soon as you're called out for telling the secret, your words of regret may seem like you are trying to avoid a confrontation and appease the person you hurt. When you are faced with a decision of whether or not to keep a secret if you feel like it’s hurting someone, my advice is to listen to your gut feeling about it. On the plus side, if someone does use this method, you just have to change your AppleID password to lock them out. She covers a variety of topics, including parenting, nutrition, mental health, gardening, food and crafts. wikiHow is a “wiki,” similar to Wikipedia, which means that many of our articles are co-written by multiple authors. wikiHow is a “wiki,” similar to Wikipedia, which means that many of our articles are co-written by multiple authors. Hiding How You Feel Take a deep breath before you talk to them. To create this article, 62 people, some anonymous, worked to edit and improve it over time. Learn to notice when you’re about to make a snarky remark, and stop yourself before you do. If necessary, find a reason to leave. A little empathy is sometimes enough to get someone to open up and unburden themselves." By using our site, you agree to our. Suggest that the person tell you the secret right before they tell other people, so you do not have to keep the secret very long. Talk about other things with your friends. Have a talk with them about how important it is to you that they keep that secret. Don't tell her your secrets anymore, ince she has proved she's not worthy of your trust. Even when you will never see them again or do not care about them, always keep secrets. Telling a spouse about my friend’s secret might make him or her not to trust me because there’s this saying: “show me your friend and I will tell you who you are”. You just learned that your friend is somewhat untrustworthy; you’ll have to decide whether you think this is a one-time thing, or part of a pattern. If it is a serious secret, make a plan to give yourself and the person you’re going to tell uninterrupted time alone to talk and discuss the secret. Make a list of your suspicions and information you have to back up your gut feeling. // Leaf Group Lifestyle, How to Handle Put Downs From Close Relatives, Psychology Today: How to Apologize to a Woman, Truth and Deception: How to Give an Effective Apology, Redbook: Right Your Wrong: How to Apologize Gracefully. How can I do this? Those secrets send the message that your child (or someone else) might get into trouble for telling the truth. We know ads can be annoying, but they’re what allow us to make all of wikiHow available for free. You need to trust the person with whom this happened and trust yourself to never tell. All tip submissions are carefully reviewed before being published. Maybe they twist the truth to keep someone from getting hurt. If you offer it as soon as you're called out for telling the secret, your words of regret may seem like you are trying to avoid a confrontation and appease the person you hurt. You can adjust this default by choosing with each post who can see it. Who and when can they tell? It’s good to open your home and welcome everyone on the holidays. Making it clear that you regret telling the secret and you feel bad that you did so makes your apology more sincere, notes Sam Margulies in "Psychology Today." Take some time to think through your apology. Don’t forget your mailing address—your gift might be shipped right from the store. {"smallUrl":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/images\/thumb\/e\/ed\/Break-Up-with-Someone-Without-Giving-Any-Reasons-Step-6.jpg\/v4-460px-Break-Up-with-Someone-Without-Giving-Any-Reasons-Step-6.jpg","bigUrl":"\/images\/thumb\/e\/ed\/Break-Up-with-Someone-Without-Giving-Any-Reasons-Step-6.jpg\/aid134781-v4-728px-Break-Up-with-Someone-Without-Giving-Any-Reasons-Step-6.jpg","smallWidth":460,"smallHeight":345,"bigWidth":728,"bigHeight":546,"licensing":"